Each and every one of us found ourselves unpleasantly confronted with violence. It has many forms: it can be physical, psychological, verbal, silent, loud. There are moments in which we can’t see anything but violence. Our media and daily source of information are filled with news related to violence, even in its most brutal forms. It is therefore easy for us to fall into the conception that all around us is violence, and violence alone. Also you, right now, while reading this post might be feeling as surrounded by different forms of violence. But is it true? Or, even better, is it completely true?
Bad things happen, it is part of the human experience on earth, does it make them totalizing? Lao Tzu, a famous ancient Chinese poet, wrote “a falling tree makes more noise than a growing forest”, it means that bad things happening around us can easily make us perceive them as more important or present than all the other good ones that are also happening at the same time. This is a perception-bias that is inherited in every human being, no exception, therefore it means that it is not you the one who is making a little judgmental error, but we all are!
“But what could we do to reverse this trend then?” you might be asking. here follows a small list of counteracts that you can put in place to contrast this global trend:
- Whenever you read news related to violence, look for news related to something amazing that has happened in the world on the same day. The world is filled with good news, more than you can imagine!
- Always respond with kindness to verbal or silent violence that might happen around you or directly to you. Remember this little thing: people who act with violence, are generally the ones who are running away from fears and threats. For them it is a way of safeguarding their person and it is irrational. Only kindness can heal these wounds. It doesn’t mean simply to passively accept any bad behaviour coming at you, but understanding the underlying reasons behind it! Answering to violence with other violence doesn’t bring us anywhere!
- Often ask those you love how they feel and ask them to do the same with you. Feeling heard and understood keeps us away from any form of violence!
- Whenever you feel a deep anger coming out from you, breathe and remember where that anger comes from: will acting with violence solve your anger or will it make it worse? You will see that actually that anger will go away in the blink of an eye, and you will release all your stress.
What are the actions that you would recommend against violence?